Post by Dave Dangerously on Apr 18, 2011 10:13:31 GMT -6
Tonight:
From the sold out D.C. Armory, in Washington D.C.
Insanity,
Personified.
It's time for the return of a classic.
It's time for a showdown of the ages.
It's time for a over-the-top battle royal.
Two combatants start in the ring.
Every 2 minutes, another comes out.
Eliminations occur when an individual is thrown over the top rope, and both feet must touch the floor.
The final two combatants, the match stops, a steel cage lowers from the ring,
And the first one to ESCAPE the cage, is the winner.
That person will go on to face the ICW World Champion, next week!
Get ready for excitement!
Get ready for adrenaline!
,
Get read for the INSANE RUMBLE!
From the sold out D.C. Armory, in Washington D.C.
Insanity,
Personified.
It's time for the return of a classic.
It's time for a showdown of the ages.
It's time for a over-the-top battle royal.
Two combatants start in the ring.
Every 2 minutes, another comes out.
Eliminations occur when an individual is thrown over the top rope, and both feet must touch the floor.
The final two combatants, the match stops, a steel cage lowers from the ring,
And the first one to ESCAPE the cage, is the winner.
That person will go on to face the ICW World Champion, next week!
Get ready for excitement!
Get ready for adrenaline!
,
Get read for the INSANE RUMBLE!
THE FIREWORKS EXPLODE INSIDE THE D.C. ARMORY! THE FANS ARE GOING MILDLY CRAZY!
We see such signs as:
"ICW, ABOUT TIME!"
"SAVE US, Y2A!"
"HOYAKILL(ED)"
"LET'S GET DANGEROUS"
"YOKOZUNA X = RATINGS"
"LONE WOLF = RATNIGS!"
The camera shows the ring, and then hovering above it, a steel cage.
The camera cuts to the announce position.
Joey Styles: Hello everyone and welcome to the ICW INSANE RUMBLE!!!
I'm the voice of Insanity Joey Styles and with me, making a return to ICW commentary, the ruler of HELL'S KITCHEN...CHEF GORDON RAMSAY!
Gordon Ramsay: Joey- IT'S RAW! IT'S RUBBISH! IT'S THE ICW INSANE RUMBLE. Shite, I've never been so excited!
JS: That's right, Gordon, and we're very excited to be here in our Nation's capitol.
Gary Michael Cappeta: At this time, I would like to introduce our special guest commentator for this evening...
THE ICW WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION, "THE GLADIATOR", TOMMY HARRISON!!!!
"The Zoo" by Bruce Dickinson hits, and out comes the ICW World champ, to a great ovation from the crowd.
He walks down, dressed in business attire, sunglasses, and the ICW title belt draped over his shoulder. He takes his seat at the announce position.
JS: Welcome, champ! It's good to see you!
The Gladiator Harrison: It's good to be here, Joey. I've got to come out and scout the talent here in this Rumble. Next week, I will be facing the winner in a one-on-one match, and well...let me tell you something. The Gladiator doesn't plan on losing it anytime soon, you know what I mean?
GR: Let me ask you something, Tommy. If that is your real name...what do you think of the scallops and the rizzoto?
Ramsay has prepared an entree for the ICW Champion.
Harrison: Well...you know, I am used to fine dining, and, well...
GR: Bollocks. RUBBISH. PURE RUBBISH. YOU AND YOUR TITLE WILL GO IN THE BIN NEXT WEEK.
JS: Anyway, it's time to find out who's going to start this battle royal off, guys. Let's find out who drew number 1!
Harrison: The suspense is killing the old time EWA audience that might be watching this.
Gary Michael Cappetta: AND NOW, LET US INTRODUCE TO YOU, THE INDIVIDUAL WHO DREW NUMBER ONE...
"BBB" By How To Destroy Angels hits.
Gary Michael Cappeta: ...FROM NEW YORK CITY!
Harrison: Who is it?
JS: Wait. Can it be???
Gary Michael Cappeta: HE IS THE MOST DANGEROUS MAN IN WRESTLING, TODAY!!!
JS: WHAT???
Gary Micahel Cappeta: DAVE....DANGEROUSLY!!!!!!
The crowd goes nuts, as Dave Dangerously steps out from behind the curtain. Half of the crowd boos him, and the other half cannot believe that he drew #1.
JS: Here comes quite possibly the greatest ICW superstar of all time, former owner of ICW and former multi-time champion, Dave Dangerously!
GR: Looks like he got the short end of the bollocky wooden spoon, yeah?
JS: Harrison, what if Dangerously were to survive at #1 and make it all the way to the end, and face you?
Harrison: Well, Dangerously and I have had a bit of a rivalry in the past, but we've never had an official one-on-one match. I would look forward to it, like I would all other competitors.
Dangerously enters the ring, and awaits the 2nd entrant...
Gary Michael Cappeta: And the person who drew NUMBER TWO...
"To Arms in Dixie" hits...
Gary Michael Cappeta: BUBBA...SOUTH!!!!!
JS: BUBBA SOUTH IS HERE!
Harrison: F'N interesting...
GS: IT'S RAW! IT'S COLD!
Bubba South hits the ring, as the bell sounds
Ding, Ding
He slides under the ring, and charges Dave Dangerously.
JS: Now remember the rules, to be eliminated you must be thrown OVER the top rope and BOTH FEET-
Bubba South charges Dave Dangerously, Dave whips him into the ropes, and on the rebound hits The 4D!!!!!! THE DAVE DANGEROUSLY DEATH DROP!!!!
The fans chant 4D, 4D, 4D!
GR: WHOA! GET IT TOGETHER, RED TEAM!!!!
Harrison: Damn, son.
JS: DANGEROUSLY WITH THE 4D! SOUTH IS OUT!!!
Dangerously picks up Bubba South who is out cold, and throws him over the top rope.
Eliminated, Bubba South
The fans cheer for Dave, as he is pumped up, looking to the entrance to bring on the next opponent.
JS: Bubba South eliminated in record time!!!
GR: DANGEROUSLY IS RAW! HE HASN'T LOOKED THIS GOOD IN YEARS! HE IS A PRIME CUT OF VEAL! FUCKING THROW IT OUT RUBBISH RAW!!!!!
Harrison: What's the deal with this guy, Joey?
JS: Oh, he's just British.
Dangerously crouches in the center of the ring, waiting for the next entrant...
10...
9...
8...
7...
6...
5...
4...
3...
2...
1...
BUZZZZZZZZZ!!!!!!
"Malaguena Salerosa" hits, and out comes Conquistador UNO!!!! The fans give him a warm welcome, especially the latino community here in D.C.
JS: Here comes one half of the 4-time ICW World Tag Team Champions! The high flying luchadore UNO!
GR: And these fans here in DC sure love him! Also they love the turkey burger sliders I handed out before the show...
Harrison: Yeah and I'm working on getting these jerks out of DC, by the way.
JS: What? The latino community? YOU'RE TERRIBLE.
Harrison: Don't worry, I know of a private island where I can dump them.
GR: Is it like the island on LOST?
Harrison: No, that's a different island, that I also own and control. Obviously.
Uno hits the ring, and Dangerously IMMEDIATELY KNOCKS HIM DOWN WITH A CLOTHESLINE!
GR: OOH!
Dangerously picks him up...THE 4D!!! THE DAVE DANGEROUSLY DEATH DROP!!!
He takes Uno over his head, PRESS SLAM TO THE OUTSIDE!!!!
Eliminated, Conquistador Uno
The fans can't believe this!
GR: DANGEROUSLY, DOMINATING DIRECTLY DECIMATING DURING MY DIGRESSION.
Harrison: This place is a three-ring circus.
JS: Dangerously showing
great intensity here early long. Harrison, you've got to think he could be a contender for your title here.
Harrison: I'm not afraid of Dave Dangerously, and if I have to prove it by beating his ass, so be it. I'd beat his ass just as soon as I'd beat Uno's ass, just as soon as i'd beat Gordon's ass. It doesn't matter. Say, where did UNO go, anyway?
Dangerously waits in the ring, with an intensity he seemingly hasn't had in years. He waits for the next entrant, without showing any relent.
GR: Dangerously is like a fat woman at a buffet line. He's totally cleaning up.
Harrison: Say something non-food related.
GR:....TRUFFLES.
JS: Dangerously so impressive early on. And you're right, Tommy, where did Uno go to?
Dave Dangerously awaits the next entrant, as the timer begins to count down...
10...
9...
8...
7...
6...
5...
4...
3...
2...
1...
BUZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!!!!!!!
Harrison: Here we go!
GR: WHO SHALL IT BE???
"the Ecstacy of Gold" hits, and out comes Calvin Constantine to a great reaction to the fans.
He runs out, and stops at the ring, apron, playing it up to the fans!
JS: FORMER ICW WORLD CHAMP CALVIN CONSTANTINE IS HERE! OH WOW CONSTANTINE VS. DANGEROUSLY I THOUGHT I'D NEVER SEE THIS!!!
Harrison: Let me tell you, Constantine was one of the toughest challenges of my career! He could totally win this thing. He's one of few who actually has my respect.
GR: PINTO BEANS
Constantine jumps onto the ring apron, as Dangerously charges him...
Constantine jumps off, and lands back on the floor. He wags his finger at Dangerously, and begins to walk around the ring.
JS: What? What's Constantine doing here?
The fans are booing Constantine as he refuses to enter the ring, he walks over to the time keeper and grabs a steel chair, sitting in it.
Dangerously is yelling at him to "get in the ring, mother fucker", but Constantine merely looks at the fans, and looks at Dangerously, and flips him off!!
JS: New attitude here from Calvin Constantine! He's seemingly uninterested in Dave Dangerously, here!
Harrison: Very strange for Constantine. Could be all part of a gameplan here, I suppose. We'll have to wait and see.
Dangerously paces in the ring, as the ever-so-calm Constantine sits at the ringside area, folding his legs and relaxing in his chair.
Dangerously is furious, attempting to taunt Constantine, but it's no use, Constantine is as cool as a cucumber here.
GR: Speaking of Cucumbers, did you know that the cucumber sauce used in traditional greek gyros can be used as a great substitute for ranch dressing? Read all about it in my new book: The Pretentious Kitchen.
JS: I actually think I saw a copy of that book when I used to hang out with ECAL back in the day.
Harrison: ECAL?
JS: Errr, that is to say, Y2A. Shut up, it was just a joke anyway. I used to be his number one fan, you know.
Harrison:...that's geigh.
The timer counts down, as Dangerously looks on towards the ring, to see who will be coming out next...
10...
9...
8...
7...
6...
5...
4...
3...
2...
1!!!!!!
BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!!!!!!!!
JS: WHO WILL IT BE???
"Stress" by Justice hits, and out comes ICW newcomer HAWK!!! The fans give a mild reaction, as they haven't seen much from this competitor, yet.
JS: ICW newcomer HAWK coming out, Dangerously looking ready to go!
Harrison: Look at this guy! He is huge!
GR: He might be giving you a run for you money there, nancy boy.
Harrison: The SCHLICK?
JS: Indeed, Hawk having one of the most impressive physiques here in ICW, definitely comparable to you, champ!
Hawk hits the ring, charges Dangerously. Dangerously goes for a clothesline! Hawk ducks!
Hawk runs off the ropes, Dangerously goes for a SUPERKICK! HAWK DUCKS! BOUNCES OFF THE ROPES, HITS DANGEROUSLY WITH THE ARES' SPEAR!!! THE FANS GO CRAZY!
JS: SPEAR TO DANGEROUSLY! HE IS DOWN FOR THE FIRST TIME IN THIS MATCH!!!
GR: OOoh, that spear looked as good as yours, Thomas!
Harrison: ...Ares' Spear? Wait, wasn't he on MadTV?
Hawk picks up Dangerously, and THROWS HIM OVER THE TOP ROPE!!!!!
ELIMINATED, DA-
WAIT, DANGEROUSLY HANGS ON!!!!!!
Hawk is trying to throw Dangerously over the top rope, but Dangerously, the veteran, hangs on like a coiled snake.
JS: It's not going to be that easy to eliminate someone such as Dave Dangerously.
Harrison: Hawk looking IMPRESSIVE out there!
Constantine looks on, on the outside, very impressed by what he sees, and very excited to see dangerously hanging on a by a thread.
JS: Now don't forget, Constantine is still in this thing!
Hawk gives up on trying to eliminate Dangerously at the moment, and goes to work on the Hardcore Icon, clubbing him in the back.
Dangerously breaks free, and starts to box away at Hawk. Left punch, right, left, right, HAWK COUNTERS INTO THE ARMAGEDDON 2001 ROCK BOTTOM!
GR: THE HAWK IS RAW, THE HAWK IS RAW!
Harrison:...I can't tell if that's a food comment.
JS: Dangerously is down, not looking good!
Hawk looks to the outside, and points at Harrison.
JS: OOOH! HAWK SENDING A MESSAGE HERE???
Constantine looks over at Harrison, as Harrison stands up from the table, pointing back at Hawk.
Harrison: You punk. YOU JUST PAY ATTENTION TO WHAT'S GOING ON IN THE RING. YOU WANT A FIGHT? YOU THINK I'M AFRAID OF YOU?
Hawk then also points at Constantine, and starts to walk towards him, exiting the ring through the second rope and standing half on the apron...
JS: HAWK IS GONNA GET CONSTANTINE INTO THIS MATCH!
Just then, the countdown begins, and Hawk re-enters the ring.
10...
9...
8...
7...
6...
5...
4...
3...
2...
1..
BUZZZZZZZZZZZZ!
"Apocalypse Please" hits, and out comes Lou E. Dangerously to a chorus of boos.
JS: The Dangerous Alliance is now in this match, Dave has some backup!
Harrison: Hawk better mind his own business now, you can't trust the Dangerouslys.
JS: HE is carrying Dave's signature barbed wire wrapped steel chair!
Dangerously hits the ring, and swings the chair at Hawk, Hawk ducks, and HAWK PUNCHES THE CHAIR INTO DANGEROUSLY'S FACE, INSTANTLY BUSTING HIM OPEN!!!
The fans chant HOLY SHIT, HOLY SHIT!
JS: OH MY GOD!!!
GR: IT'S BLOODY! IT'S RAW!!!
Lou falls down, and then gets up to his knees, leaning on the ropes. Hawk throws the chair to the outside, as it narrowly misses Constantine.
Dangerously gets up from behind and charges Hawk, as his back is turned.
JS: Look out, Hawk!!!
Hawk steps out of the way, and Dangerously clotheslines DANGEROUSLY, OVER THE TOP ROPE!!!
Eliminated, Lou E. Dangerously
The fans go crazy, as Dave cannot believe it!
At this point, Calvin Constantine slides into the ring, and hits Hawk with the 180DDT!!! Constantine then slides back under the ropes, and goes back to the outside, sitting in his chair, as the fans boo.
GR: CONSTANTINE WITH THE TOMFOOLERY HERE!
Harrison: This new change in Constantine...it's very unusual.
JS: Hawk is down in the middle of the ring, and Dangerously is now on top of this rumble, again!
Just then, the countdown begins.
10...
9...
8...
7...
6...
5...
4...
3...
2...
1...
BUZZZZ!!!!!
the lights go out.
JS: WHAT??
"Bond Theme" hits, and the crowd goes wild!
JS: HE'S HERE!
And out comes ScottiePP7 to a huge ovation from the crowd. He leaves Miss Clee Tarus on the stage and runs out to the ring, to a bewildered Dave Dangerously.
Harrison: The original ICW-ite!
GR: ICW'S VERY OWN PAUL PRUDHOMME!
JS: PP7 vs Dangerously? SHOWCASE OF THE IMMORTALS!
PP7 slides into the ring, kicks Dangerously in the midsection, PP7DDT!!! The fans are going crazy!!!
JS: HE GOT HIM WITH THE DDT! WAIT - NO!
Dangerously reverses the PP7 DDT into THE 4D!!!!!!!! THE DAVE DANGEROUSLY DEATH DROP!!!!!!
PP7 bounces to his feet, Dangerously CLOTHESLINES HIM OVER THE TOP ROPE!!!
Eliminated, ScottiePP7
The fans can't believe it, as Dangerously is fired up after eliminating the former owner of ICW.
JS: PP7 is gone!
Harrison: Dangerously is dominating this rumble, so far, guys. I'm really impressed.
Dangerously then slides out to the ringside area, and walks up to Constantine, meanwhile Hawk is getting to his feet in the ring corner.
JS: Ut OH! What's this now?
Dangerously points at Constantine, but Calvin is unaffected. He just sits in his chair, arms crossed. Dangerously points at the ring as if telling Constantine to get in there, but just then, Dangerously notices the steel chair, wrapped in barbed wire, that Lou E. Dangerously brought down to the ring.
GR: Dangerously going for the gusto here! THROW IT OUT!
Harrison: That steel chair has defeated several foes, in it's history. It's a ICW legend in itself...
JS: And it's the deadliest in the hands of Dangerously! He's gonna use it on Hawk!!!
Dangerously slides the chair into the ring, and slowly walks up the ring steps, as the countdown begins...
10...
9...
8...
7...
6...
5...
4...
3...
2...
1...
BUZZ!!!!!!!
"Stress" by Justice hits and out comes Dove, Hawk's partner, to a big reaction from the ICW fanbase.
JS: ICW's newest female member and Hawk's partner, Dove! She's coming to hopefully rescue him!
Harrison: Perfect timing!!
Dove hits the ring, and goes for Dangerously by climbing to the top rope, hitting THE PACIFIER, THE TOP ROPE FLYING HURRICANRANA!!! DANGEROUSLY IS DOWN!
JS: WHAT A HURICANRANA!!!
GR: That one almost made MY perfect hair stand on end!
Dove goes to the corner to check on Hawk, as he gets to his feet.
Dave, on the other side of the ring, picks up the steel chair, and charges Dove, who has her back turned!
JS: OH NO, DANGEROUSLY WITH THAT CHAIR!!!
Dangerously charges, but Hawk PUSHES DOVE OUT OF THE WAY, HAWK GETS A BARBED-WIRE STEEL CHAIR SHOT TO THE HEAD!!! the impact SENDS HIM FLYING OVER THE TOP ROPE!!!
Eliminated, Hawk
Dove can't believe it, Hawk sacrificed himself to save her, she looks to the outside to check on Hawk, but as she turns around, Dangerously, still wielding the steel chair, NAILS HER IN THE FACE, SENDING HER OVER THE TOP ROPE!!!
Eliminated, Dove
Hawk and Dove both on the outside, as Dangerously throws the chair to the outside, leaning into the corner to catch his breath.
JS: DANGEROUSLY JUST COMMITED AN ASSAULT ON HAWK AND DOVE!
Harrison: In poor taste to use a CHAIR on someone who's back is turned, but this IS ICW, I suppose...
GR: What bollockry to use a chair on a woman, however. Shut it down, throw it out, etc.
JS: Well, in any event, Dave Dangerously is exerting his dominance here in this Insane Rumble, and it's almost time to see who's next!!!
The countdown begins, as Dangerously watches. Cut to Constantine watching from the outside, as well.
10...
9...
8...
7...
6...
5...
4...
3...
2...
1...
BUZZZZZZ
"Sick of Life" by Godsmack hits, and out comes Sylver Morrigan to a huge ovation from the fans!!!
JS: ICW's ORIGINAL FEMME FATALE!
GR: If only she was a moment earlier, we could have had some GIRL ON GIRL ACTION!!!
Harrison: You're despicible. But correct.
Morrigan enters the ring, and charges Dangerously, but Dangerously grabs her by the hair and rushes her with the momentum, over the top rope, SHE GOES FLYING THROUGH THE AIR, TOWARDS THE ANNOUNCE TABLE,
HARRISON AND STYLES MOVE OUT OF THE WAY, BUT RAMSAY DOES NOT, SHE GOES CRASHING INTO RAMSAY AND THROUGH THE TABLE!!!!!
Eliminated, Sylver Morrigan
(and Gordon Ramsay)
There is no audio for a moment, as Dave leans on the ropes, looking at the mess. Constantine is up in his chair, hands on his head in bewilderment. Styles and Harrison pick through the mess to get their headsets.
JS: ....OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!
Harrison: Well, Gordon...you got your girl action afterall.
JS: I can't believe this! Morrigan tried to get the advantage on Dangerously but Dangerously WOULD. NOT. BE. BUM. RUSHED!!!
Harrison: Someone get Ramsay's ass out of here!
EMT's come to get Ramsay, as he is fucked to death. Morrigan gets up, and limps off, to a great reaction from the crowd.
Dangerously lays down in the corner, a-la Raven, waiting for the next entrant.
JS: Dangerously has been in at number one, and he has DOMINATED THIS MATCH!!!
Harrison: By my count, he has elimated 7 people so far, which ties the current Insane Rumble record set by Dan Hampton.
JS: Wow!
The countdown begins, as Dangerously looks on...
10...
9...
8...
7...
6...
5...
4...
3...
2...
1...
BUZZZ!!!!
"You Got The Touch" bt Stan Bush hits.
Harrison: Who is it?
JS:...IT'S X-DUDE!!! THAT IS TO SAY, THE OX!!! THE FORMER PRESIDENT OF THE E.F.W.O.!!!!!!!
And out comes The Ox, to a mixed reaction from the ICW crowd, as some of the ICW loyalists boo him, but there are a lot of EFWO and T.O.P. fans in the audience cheering him on.
He walks out with his hands on his waist, as Dave Dangerously looks STUNNED.
JS: THE MATCH 10 YEARS IN THE WAITING...DAVE DANGEROUSLY VS THE OX!!!
Harrison: It's just funny that now they're both under different names, because for years fans clamored for a X-Dude/Dave Dudley match. But they're gonna get a showdown here!!!
The Ox enters the ring slowly, and faces off with Dangerously in the middle of the ring.
JS: FOR YEARS, BOTH MEN WERE THE PRESIDENTS OF THEIR RESPECTIVE COMPANYS. THIS IS THE ULTIMATE ICW VS. EFWO SHOWDOWN!!!
The Ox and Dangerously stare each other down for a bit, and SUDDENLY, CALVIN CONSTANTINE COMES INTO THE RING!!!
Harrison: Now, Calvin is showing his face.
Dave and Ox look at Constantine, look at each other, and they both start pummeling away on Constantine! They beat him into the corner, and then Dangerously starts to punch away on the Ox, moving the two away from the corner and from Constantine.
Dave whips Ox into the ropes, he goes for the 4D!!!! but Ox wiggles free, sliding to the outside!
JS: Ox avoiding the 4D, Narrowly!!!
Constantine comes up behind Dangerously and grabs, him, but Dave spins around and counters with the 4D!!!!!!! THE DAVE DANGEROUSLY DEATH DROP!!!
Calvin has the vision to roll out of the ring, and lay on the ring floor.
Harrison: WHOA! Quick counter there by The Hardcore Icon.
JS: OX and Dangerously staring each other down, here!
Just then, the countdown begins...
10...
9...
8...
7...
6...
5...
4...
3...
2...
1...
BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZz
"Halloween" by John Carpenter hits.
The arena grows dark, and lightning crashes around the stadium.
JS: OH NO! HE's HERE!!!
The Ox smiles as the lights return, and the Theatre of Pain is in full effect, as The One True Warrior makes his way out, as the fans go wild.
JS: THe T.O.P. is back in ICW!!!
Harrison: Looks like The Ox has some backup, now!
The Warrior stops and high-fives The Ox, and the two enter the ring, and charge Dangerously, immediately doubleteaming him, punching away.
JS: Dangerously, who has faced all odds here in this rumble so far,is now finally at a disadvantage! He's got to take on both members of the T.O.P. here!
Dangerously tries to fight back, fighting off Warrior, and focusing on Ox, but the dual attack proves to be too much to fight, as the TOP takes their toll on Dangerously, whipping him into the corner. They both then proceed to try to eliminate him, by trying to throw his legs up and over the ropes, as Warrior applies a chokehold.
JS: Looks like they both might succeed in eliminating Dangerously, here!
Harrison: The TOP has a big history here in ICW, lots of feuds with Dude Hate...
JS: They once were several members strong in the early days of ICW, Tommy.
Harrison: Remember Simeon?
Dangerously holds on, hitting Warrior with a thumb to the eye. Warrior holds off, and Dangerously starts to work on the Ox. Ox goes for a big sweeping clothesline, but Dangerously ducks. He hits the Ox with the SUPER HERO KICK super kick! Ox gets rocked to the ring ropes, Dangerously charges him, but Warrior tackles Dangerously, preventing the elimination!!!
JS: Ox is lucky to have his TOP stablemate in there, that could have been a quick elimination!
The countdown begins, again...
10...
9...
8...
7...
6...
5...
4...
3...
2...
1...
BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZz
"Nate Sharp's music" hits, and out comes Nate Sharp to a great reaction from the crowd.
JS: Former EFWO superstar Nate Sharp making his ICW debut here!
Harrison: What the hell? Now we've got 3 EFWO guys in here. What's going on?
JS: Luck of the draw! Extremely lucky if they want to eliminate Dangerously, here!
Sharp hits the ring, as the camera shows Constantine sitting, leaning his back on the guard railing, watching the match.
Warrior has Dangerously down on the mat, as Nate Sharp takes a look at the Ox. They both stare at each other, and then Sharp starts to put the boots to Dangerously!
Ox is directing traffic here, as he directs Warrior AND Nate Sharp now to eliminate Dangerously. They manage to toss him over the top rope, but Dangerously hangs on, coiled like a snake!
As Ox and Sharp are trying to eliminate Dangerously, by trying to push him off the ring, Warrior slides under the bottom rope and begins to stalk Calvin Constantine.
JS: Constantine has been in this match a while, but hasn't been IN the match more than a few seconds!
Harrison: If you ask me, Joey, he's playing it smart. Classic move on Constantine's part, that's why he is one of the sharpest wrestling minds in ICW today.
Warrior chases Constantine around the ring, as Constantine is seemingly terrified of the One True Warrior.
Back in the ring, Nate Sharp and the OX are still trying to eliminate Dangerously.
Dangerously forearms The Ox in the chin, and he is let loose for a minute, before Sharp clubs Dangerously in the back, and the two resume the elimination attempt.
JS: Dangerously using his well known ring presence to coil around the ropes like a python!
Constantine slides back into the ring, and Warrior enters the ring with him. Constantine attemps to run away from the Warrior some more, but he is met by The OX! Who has turned his attention away from Dave Dangerously.
Meanwhile, Sharp and Dangerously are now in the corner, trading blows, as Dangerously has gained the upperhand. Sharp goes for a charging clothesline, but Dangerously ducks. Sharp spins around, and is hit with A SUPERKICK! SHARP GOES OVER THE TOP ROPE...
JS: SHARP GOING OUT HERE!
But instead falls through the middle rope. Dangerously slumps into the corner, as The Ox and The Warrior, the TOP, stomp away at Constantine in the opposite corner.
At this point, the timer counts down!
10...
9...
8...
7...
6...
5...
4...
3...
2...
1...
BUZZZZZ!!!
Harrison: Who's it going to be, this time?
As Dangerously looks towards the ramp, Constantine rolls back out into the floor area. The TOP then turns back towards Dangerously, who starts to back away. Nate Sharp then rolls into the ring, and the 3 look towards Dangerously.
Suddenly, from the crowd, someone runs into the ring!
JS: What the hell? Who is that?
Harrison: SECURITY!
JS: Wait, no! It's
Former EFWO superstar, SHOGUN!!! The fans are bewildered! He enters the ring, looks at the TOP, looks at Sharp, and then they all 4 of them look at Dangerously!
JS: The ICW Insane Rumble has been impacted by a EFWO group, and now they're after the man who terrorized them for years!!
They all attack and group up on Dangerously, punching away on him from all sides.
Constantine on the outside, still.
Harrison: Man, I'm getting tired of Constantine.
Harrison drops his headset, and grabs Constantine from behind, throwing him by his hair into the ring!
JS: The champ throwing Calvin back in there! He's still in this match, he needs to participate!
At this point, Sharp and Shogun take on Constantine, and The Ox and The Warrior focus on Dangerously. Sharp whips Constantine from the corner to the middle of the ring,
as The Warrior whips Dangerously in the same fashion, Dangerously and Constantine collide in the middle! They both go crashing down.
Harrison: Couldn't take that anymore. He needs to get in there and take his beating!
Dangerously gets up and The Ox whips him back into the corner. Warrior then lifts Dangerously on top of the turnbuckle!
JS: Warrior is going for THE VANQUISHER!
As Warrior sets him up, Sharp gets an irish whip reversed by him, and Sharp goes flying into The Ox, courtesy of Constantine, who falls into Warrior, knocking him off the turnbuckle and falling to the outside ring apron. Ox, enraged, goes flying towards Sharp, knocking him down with a clothesline.
Meanwhile, Constantine and Shogun are battling it out now.
JS: Warrior needs to be careful here, he's teetering on the turnbuckle!
Warrior pulls him self up off the apron, just then, Dangerously flies off the top rope and catches Warrior with A DAVE DANGEROUSLY DEATH DROP/CUTTER SNARING WARRIOR'S NECK ON THE TOP ROPE!!! Dangerously falls to the canvas, Warrior falls to the outside!!!
Eliminated, The One True Warrior
Just then, the countdown begins...
10...
9...
8...
7...
6...
5...
4...
3...
2...
1...
BUZZZZZZZZZ!!!!!!!!!!!
the lights go out. The ring is illuminated by camera flashes, as the fans go crazy!
JS: Warrior is out, and who's going to be coming out here???
Harrison: What the hell is with the lights? Wait...it feels like...
The lights come back on in the ring, and KING GENESIS IS STANDING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE RING.
The Ox immediately goes toward Genesis, but Genesis punches him down.
JS: GENESIS! THE ICW KING! HE IS HERE!
Harrison: Someone throw his ass out!
JS: Are you afraid of him, Tommy?
Harrison: Hell no. He isn't even IN my league.
Sharp rushes Genesis, Genesis hits him with THE ARCLIGHT SUPERKICK! Sharp goes over the top rope!!!
Eliminated, Nate Sharp
Genesis then grabs Shogun from behind, Shogun spins around and kicks Genesis in the midsection. Shogun begins to punch away at Genesis.
JS: GENESIS MAKING THE IMPACT! SHARP IS OUT!
Shogun misses a clothesline, and Genesis kicks Shogun in the midsection. Shogun blocks, and Genesis holds on and hits Shogun with an enziguri to the side of the head!
Genesis lands on his hands and one leg, as Shogun gets rocked to the side of the ropes, Genesis hops up and into THE ARCLIGHT SUPERKICK! SHOGUN ROCKED UP AND OVER THE TOP ROPE!
Eliminated, Shogun
Genesis is then attacked from behind by Constantine, as Constantine works Genesis over with clubbing forearms to the back.
Harrison: Well there goes the big EFWO group.
JS:The Ox is suprised here, he had a bit of backup there, a tenative alliance!
Just then, The Ox looking around at the ring, noticing his "backup" is gone. From behind, Dave Dangerously spins The OX around, THE 4D! THE DAVE DANGEROUSLY DEATH DROP! The OX is down in the middle of the ring!!!
JS: THe 4D! AMAZING 4D! The OX is down, meanwhile Constantine si trying to eliminate Genesis there in the corner!
Harrison: Dangerously is still holding on here in the ring, he's been in since #1!! Spectacular performance.
Dangerously leaning on the ropes, facing The Ox, who is getting to his knees. Dangerously looking to the crowd, raising his arms, the crowd is actually getting pumped up for him.
JS: The crowd almost pulling for Dangerously here!
Just then, the countdown begins!
10...
9...
8...
7...
6...
5...
4...
3...
2...
1...
BUZZZZZZZZZZZz
"War is the Answer" by Five Finger Death Punch hits, and out comes Murdoch MacArthur to a great reaction from the fans! He stands on the stage, looking at the rumble going on in progress.
Back in the ring, Dangerously getting ready to pounce on The Ox.
JS: Here comes Murdoch! He's going to be fresh and ready to go!
Harrison: Wait, Joey. Who is that???
From the audience, runs a man in black.
JS: WAIT WHO IS THAT???
The masked man wearing all black hops up on the ring apron behind Dangerously, AND HITS DANGEROUSLY IN THE BACK OF THE HEAD WITH A BLACK BASEBALL BAT!
Dangerously drops down to his knees in the ring, as the man in black falls back to the ring area. We can see Murdoch pass him by in the background, as Murdoch goes straight into the ring and heads for Constantine and Genesis, punching him away. Dangerously gets up holding his head, and turns to see the mystery man.
JS: WHO THE HELL IS THAT MAN WHO ATTACKED DANGEROUSLY??
Harrison: He's got to be hurt, Joey. That was a baseball bat! He's running on adrenaline at this point.
Dangerously looks, as the back of his head is bleeding. The masked man is standing on the stage, and he unmasks!!!
JS: OH...MY...GOD!!!!!!!
The man is revealed to be LONE WOLF!!!!!!! THE FANS ARE GOING WILD!
Harrison: LONE WOLF???
JS: ITS LONE WOLF! HE ISN'T EVEN SIGNED TO ICW!!!!! WHATS HE DOING HERE??? HE WAS THE ONE WHO ATTACKED DANGEROUSLY!!!
Dangerously looks on in amazement, as Lone Wolf gives him a smirk. From behind, The Ox charges and THROWS DANGEROUSLY OVER THE TOP ROPE!!!!
Eliminated, Dave Dangerously
THE ARENA GOES CRAZY, AS DANGEROUSLY CAN'T BELIEVE IT!
JS: DANGEROUSLY ELIMINATED BY THE OX!!!
Dangerously attempts to run towards Wolf, who is on the stage still. Dangerously collapses, and EMTs immediately come out and attend to him. Cut to a shot of Wolf who holds up his bat, and then heads to the backstage area.
Harrison: Between getting hit with that bat, and lasting since #1 in this rumble, Dangerously couldn't possibly pursue Wolf here. He's got to be completely drained.
JS: Hopefully security throws that Wolf out of this arena!!!
In the ring, Genesis and Murdoch are going one-on-one, and Constantine is working over the Ox in the corner.
the countdown begins...
10...
9...
8...
7...
6...
5...
4...
3...
2...
1...
BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZz
"Malaguena Salerosa" hits, and out comes Conquistador Dos! He hits the ring, goes straight for Genesis and Murdoch. Dos clothesines Genesis down, and goes for Murdoch, but Murdoch ducks a clothesline, whips Dos into the ropes, and hits a flapjack, turned into a POWERBOMB, GREETINGS FROM ABERDEEN! HE POWERBOMBS DOS OVER THE TOP ROPE, TO THE OUTSIDE!!!!
Eliminated, Conquistador Dos
The fans go crazy, as when Murdoch turns around GENESIS HITS HIM WITH THE ARCLIGHT SUPERKICK!!! MURDOCH GOES OVER THE TOP ROPE...BUT HANGS ON!!!!!!
JS:DOS IS OUT! MURDOCH BARELY HANGS ON!!!
Harrison: Four guys in the ring, 2 still yet to come out, Joey. This is getting intense!
JS: I hope you're watching, Harrison, your challenger for the title will be decided soon!!!
Genesis and The Ox start to trade punches, The Ox knocks down Genesis with a big forearm to the head!
From behind, Constantine with a LOW BLOW to The OX!!!!
JS: OHhhh, cheap shot by Calvin Constantine!!!
Constantine then gets attacked by Murdoch, who has recovered and reintered the ring. Constantine and Murdoch trade blows, left and right.
Genesis and The Ox have both retreated to a turnbuckle, to recover.
Just then, the countdown begins...
10...
9...
8...
7...
6...
5...
4...
3...
2...
1...
BUZZZZZZZZZZ!!!
"The Subtle Arts of Murder and Persuasion" by Lamb of God hits, and out comes Seamus O'Malley to a huge reaction from the crowd! He runs down to the ring, and immediately helps Murdoch fend off Calvin Constantine.
JS: O'Malley is here, and he is here to help his partner Murdoch!
Harrison: The IRA has indeed made it's impact here at the rumble, Joey.
O'Malley stomps and kicks at Constantine, as does Murdoch. Still recovering is Genesis and the Ox, as they watch on. Murdoch picks up Constantine onto his shoulders. O'Malley climbs the top rope, and its THE CATAPULT doomsday device but substitue the clothesline for a HURRICANRANA, CONSTANTINE GOES FLYING INTO THE ROPES, HE BOUNCES ON THEM, AND FLIES OVER THE TOP ROPE!!!!!!!!
Eliminated, Calvin Constantine
The fans go crazy, as Calvin has been finally eliminated after a night of constantly running from the fight.
JS: CONSTANTINE IS OUT! THE IRA HAVE ELIMINATED HIM!
Harrison: That's what he gets, Joey.
the IRA celebrates, as from behind, The Ox pushes O'Malley into Murdoch, and Murdoch gets knocked into the turnbuckle. The Ox and O'Malley then trade blows, but O'Malley gets the upper hand, as he is the fresher of the two. He punches The Ox into the opposite turnbuckle and then proceeds to stomp a mudhole in his ass.
Meanwhile, Genesis is back up, and starts to brawl with Murdoch in the corner.
Murdoch punches away at Genesis, and tosses him over the top rope. Genesis hangs on.
JS: GENESIS ALMOST ELIMINATED, HERE!
O'Malley drops to his knees in the middle of the ring and Murdoch charges him, he uses O'Malley as a step ladder to rush into The Ox, hitting him with a spear!!!!! OX crashes hard into the mat!
Harrison: Nice spear by Murdoch! Very impressive.
The IRA high five in the ring, as the countdown begins...
10...
9...
8...
7...
6...
5...
4...
3...
2....
1....
BUZZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
JS: HERE COMES THE LAST ENTRANT IN THE RUMBLE!!!!!!!!
"SUCKS" by KMFDM hits, and the fans go nuts for the arrival of the final entrant in the Insane Rumble, Johnny Q. Public. He rushes the ring, and immediately hits O'Malley with the ATONEMENT SUPERKICK TO THE BACK OF O'MALLEY'S HEAD, O'MALLEY GOES SPILLING TO THE OUTSIDE OF THE RING, VIA THE TOP ROPE!!!
Eliminated, Seamus O'Malley
Murdoch attacks Johnny Q. Public at this point, rushing with a clothesline, QPublic ducks, Murdoch spins around, and hits PAYBACK, THE STUNNER!!!
JS: QPUBLIC TAKING OUT THE IRA HERE! O'MALLEY IS OUT! WE'RE DOWN TO THE FINAL FOUR!!!
Murdoch immediately springs back up to his feet due to a knee-jerk reaction, and walks towards The Ox, who THROWS HIM OVER THE TOP ROPE!!!!
Eliminated, Murdoch MacArthur
At this point, The Ox and Johnny Q. Public stare each other down in the middle of the ring. The fans are going wild!
JS: AND JUST LIKE THAT, WE'RE DOWN TO THE FINAL THREE!!!!!!!!
Harrison: Fast frenetic action, that's why ICW can't be stopped.
JS: One of these three men will be facing you NEXT WEEK FOR THE ICW WORLD TITLE, Harrison.
Harrison: I look forward to the challenge.
JS: Remember, after the next elimination, the rules will change a little bit. A steel cage will lower from the ceiling, and then the first man to ESCAPE the ring and cage will be the winner.
Harrison: Going to be dealing with some cold hard steel, then.
The Ox and QPublic start poxing it out, but QPublic, the former amateur boxer, gets the advantage. Just as QPublic goes for a big knockout punch, from the other side of the ring, Genesis comes flying with THE ARCLIGHT SUPERKICK STRAIGHT TO THE CHIN OF QPUBLIC!!!
Genesis falls down from the force of the kick, and QPublic is rocked way back from the kick, immediately with a glazed over look in his eyes, and The OX TAKES ADVANTAGE, AND THROWS HIM OVER THE TOP ROPE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Eliminated, Johnny Q. Public
The fans BOO The OX as he eliminates fan favorite QPublic!
JS: QPUBLIC IS OUT!
Harrison: The Ox capitalizing on the weeks of the war of words between he and Qpublic, here.
The camera cuts to the cage, as it begins to light up, and lower.
JS: HERE COMES THE CAGE, IT'S DOWN TO THE OX VS. GENESIS HERE, AND I AM GETTING A MESSAGE DELIVERED TO ME, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN...
NOT ONLY WILL THE WINNER OF THIS MATCH GO ON TO FACE HARRISON NEXT WEEK, FOR THE ICW TITLE. BUT THE RUNNER UP, WHOEVER DOES NOT WIN BETWEEN GENESIS AND THE OX WILL IMMEDIATELY ADVANCE TO A SPOT IN THE INSANITY CELL AT DEATH AND TAXES!!!
WHAT AN ANNOUNCEMENT!!! What do you think about that, champ?
Harrison: ...
The steel cage begins to lower, and The Ox and Genesis are standing in two corners, looking at the cage, looking at each other.
Suddenly, Harrison throws off his headset.
JS: What? Harrison what are you doing?
Harrison walks towards the ring and picks up the barbed-wire wrapped steel chair.
JS: Harrison, NO! NO!!!
Harrison with the chair, walks up behind Genesis, and as Genesis leans on the ropes, HITS GENESIS IN THE BACK WITH THE BARBED WIRE STEEL CHAIR!
Genesis screams in pain, as The Ox looks on, holding his head. Genesis arcs his back and turns around, as we see his back, bloody. Genesis faces Harrison and then HARRISON HITS HIM IN THE HEAD WITH THE BARBED WIRE WRAPPED STEEL CHAIR!!!!!! GENESIS IS BUSTED WIDE OPEN!!!! HE IMMEDIATELY FALLS DOWN, AS HARRISON THROWS THE STEEL CHAIR INTO THE RING!
The fans are stunned!
JS: OH MY GOD!!!!!!! OH MY GOD!!!!!!!! I CAN'T BELIEVE HARRISON! WHAT ARE YOU DOING???
Harrison walks off towards the back, as the cage is lowered fully, and is attached by the ring crew. He has an evil look towards Genesis as he turns his back and walks to the backstage area.
JS: WHAT A CHEAP ATTACK FROM HARRISON! GENESIS IS COMPLETELY OUT!!!
Genesis, in the middle of the ring, lies on his back, eyes closed, out cold. Blood seeping out from his back onto the mat, and pouring out of his shaved head, almost gushing. EMTS start to come into the ringside area, to prepare to help, but they are stopped momentarily by the referee.
The Ox walks towards Genesis, he looks at the cage and around at the fans. He picks up the barbed wire wrapped steel chair!!!
JS: No. OX! NO!!! NOT THIS WAY!!!
The Ox picks up the steel chair, as the fans are booing. He looks down at Genesis!!!
JS: COME ON! SOMEONE STOP THIS!!!
The Ox then walks towards the steel cage door, and uses the chair to beat open the lock. He then throws the chair back into the ring. He casually exits the ring, as the referee sounds the bell.
The winner, and NEW #1 contender, The OX!
EMTS enter the ring as the cage is raised again, and they attend to Genesis. The OX shakes his head, as he seems to disapprove of the whole situation regarding Harrison and attacking Genesis.
JS: The OX is the winner here, and he did the right thing by not attacking Genesis further. The real story here is why did Harrison attack Genesis so brutally, after hearing the announcement?? In any event...The OX IS the winner here, and will face Harrison for the championship in ONE week on Mayhem!
"You got the touch" hits again, and The Ox, still looking displeased, raises his arm in victory as he walks up the ramp. Out on the stage, Harrison steps out, cutting off The Ox's music, as "The Zoo" plays again. Harrison raises up the ICW World Heavyweight title and points at The OX.
JS: THESE TWO TITANS WILL CLASH NEXT WEEK ON MAYHEM, AS WE ARE OFFICIALLY ON THE ROAD TO DEATH AND TAXES! FOR GORDON RAMSAY, TOMMY HARRISON, THIS IS JOEY STYLES, WELCOMING YOU ALL BACK TO ICW, AND THANK YOU FOR YOUR CONTINUED SUPPORT. SEE YOU NEXT WEEK ON MAYHEM!!
We see The Ox staring back at Harrison, who has a smirk on his face, as he places the ICW title over his shoulder, as the camera fades...
to black.
End transmission
Copyright The Dharma Initiative 2011